“Recovery is a resumption of the work that was not completed when the woman was a girl. It is a coming into her own. It is an opportunity to resume the normal process of development that was sidetracked, perhaps first by constrained roles, perhaps by trauma, and then multiplied many times by hiding in the addiction. Her development was sidetracked by not accepting her needs as legitimate and not finding healthy ways to meet them, by not even knowing her needs. And so this is what recovery is: a developmental process of finding and building a new self. Recovery is a process of radical growth and change. When you are in recovery, you give birth to a new self. […] Many women initially think that recovery means a move from bad to good. They think that being addicted is evidence of shameful neediness, of deep and lasting failures. Recovery is not a move from bad to good, but from false to real. […] It is reality, being real, that now guides her rather than her efforts to be good or bad.” Stephanie Brown
Addiction recovery is an individual journey. The cure for addiction is community. My books will help anyone interested in self-examination and finding the true self. They are about what I have learned on this journey I began Nov. 24, 1976.
Addictions are the bandages covering the wound of not feeling worthy. I just discovered in 2010 that my primary addiction was to my family of origin—the family I grew up in. I have a picture of myself at age 5 which is about when I started thinking that I was terribly unfit to be in this family. There was always fighting, drama and violence. We had our loving times, too. I believe that my parents did the best they could. When describing those years, I love what Adult Children of Alcoholics says about The Problem: “This is a description, not an indictment.”
But until I began healing my painful self beliefs, my self-confidence was very fragile. As I allowed those beliefs to change and become my new foundation, I became a person unafraid of what harm anyone could do to me. After I learned to love all of me, I was able to accept the rejection of others. I saw that they were just like me–they were only rejecting themselves. All hatred is really self-hatred.
In November, 2004, I started writing my first blog, Emotional Sobriety:Mind, Body, & Soul. I have written everyday since then on one of my blogs. As the main blog grew, I created separate blogs based each on one of the topics from the main blog. At one time, I had 30+ blogs but trimmed them down to 15 now. Last year, I decided to take down all my favorite posts and put them on Kindle books. I now have 8 books completed and have started on the 9th one. We live in a “sound-bite” world so I made them easy to read and reference.
Although I read Kindle books daily, I know that blogs are the best place to publish hyperlinks. Ebooks are great for content only information but not good for clicking through reference links. So for each of my books, I offer a companion blog from my 15+ blogs. The information on the book and blog is different but complementary. Kindle for content and blogs for reference links give the reader dual resources.
Kathy Berman’s Kindle Books and Matching Blogs
Companion blog–Learning Your Labels
Companion blog–Addiction Recovery May be a Dual Journey
Companion blog–Community is the Cure
Companion blog–A Recovery Toolbox of Links and Ideas
Companion blog–Recovery Quotations (Use flipcard view)
Companion blog–Emotional Sobriety: Mind, Body, & Soul